Chester

Chester
Chester at 5:30 am on his 3 month birthday!

The Chester Diaries: Celebrating the feast and famine known as new motherhood.

Welcome to my blog! My name is Lara and I gave birth in April, 2010 to a baby boy. I've been calling him "Chester" since he was a little chestnut in my tummy. To commemorate his three month birthday, I wanted to write about the crazy, joyous and exhausting ride I've been having as a first-time mom. If you're interested in reading about the highs and lows of uncharted mommy territory as well as my unhealthy obsession with shopping, (particularly baby gear), reviews, and pop culture observations, then you've come to the right place. Be warned: This cute kid has a mommy who can be a bit of a potty mouth.

Note: This blog is no longer active but please enjoy Chester's journey from 3 months to 2+ years.


Monday, September 26

Nice start to a Monday...



So I start my day today and I'm feeling industrious.  I decide to get the jump on things and go upstairs to lay out Chester's crib since he had an accident overnight.  His crib sheet was already laid out thanks to daddy but I need to set up a clean sleep sack, lovey and arrange his toys.  After, I go about my usual morning routine, making a smoothie and getting C's food prepared.  I feed him, then go to rinse out his cups.  But the kitchen sink is clogged.  Again.  We thought it was fixed last night.  No such luck.  We are out of Drano.  Great.  I try a recipe for a natural drain cleaner I found on Pinterest that calls for distilled vinegar and baking soda.  I only have regular vinegar.  Ewkay.  Um.  Does it really matter?  Let's give it a shot.  The instructions state for you to pour the contents down the drain.  Um hello?  Didn't anyone get the memo?  My drain is clogged.  Sigh.  I start to bail water.  It's not perfect, and I won't be able to bail the damn drain but I do the best I can.  I manage to slop dirty sink water on my face, glasses and freshly washed hair.  Fuck.  I pour the baking soda in, then the vinegar.  The contents hiss angrily in the sink.  Damn.  Imagine what this frothy mess would accomplish in the drain itself?  It says to let stand for 30 minutes.  I go back to feeding Chester, giving him rice cakes to finish his meal.  Afterwards, I put him in his play area for a few while I race madly upstairs and quickly wash my face again.

When I get downstairs, I smell something ungood.  C had a poo.  From the smell of it, it's a Poomageddon.  Sigh.  I struggle to get him upstairs as he writhes kicking and shrieking in my arms.  This is definitely Pooapalooza.  Why is it in when Tim gets the weekend poops, they're always a nice solid mass which are a breeze to clean?  This is pudding pop fest, and it's everywhere.  Worse yet, C's hand has snaked straight into the corner of the diaper that's leaking. I wet-wipe his hand as best I can and try to keep him from "helping," but he keeps making his business, um, well his business, and continues to rake his hand through the mess.  This is the moment I run out of wipes.  Oh great.  After we are done, I carry  him to the sink to wash his hands.  But not before he takes his "shit hand" and wipes it across my freshly washed face.  Double Fuck.

I wash his hands, put him in his crib, get him in his sleep sack, then deal with that toxic steaming mass of diaper that needs to be contained.  I extract the soiled sleeper and bring it to the washroom for Stage 1:  Spray the shit out of said sleeper with Resolve.  I had put a refill beside the bottle on the weekend hoping Tim would fill it for me.  A little trifle for him considering he never has to deal with the grossness of cleaning a soiled piece of clothing.  A pretty sweet deal yes?  Do you think that the bottle was filled, dear reader?  Do you believe my husband so charitable and kind, even grateful, to do me this one small favour?  Nope.  I know the answer before I even reach for it.  The bottle is empty.  I fill it, spray the outfit, wash my hands a million times and go back to tuck Chester in bed.  By now, the arrangement of toys and blankets I had carefully laid out earlier have been unceremoniously dumped onto the floor.



I throw everything in willy nilly, close the blinds, bid C good nap, and go wash my face.  Again.  All before noon.  I'm exhausted.  Just in time to do my workout. I guess it's true what they say.  No good deed goes unpunished.   That's quite the string of bad luck to kick off the week.  Does it get easier?

Tuesday, September 6

Finally! No small feet!

Chester has been walking here and there. It's mostly cruising but there have been many occasions over the last few months where it's clear that he knows how to do it. He just lacks confidence. Every day when Tim is at work I sit in the playroom with him and get him to walk to me. Just a step or two here. Usually if he overthinks it he'll lose his balance. But if he's not worrying about it, he'll do it without any problem. So today I'm happy to say we're finally past the cruising stage!  It started first with getting him to walk toward me. It wasn't just a step or two. It was about four or five - and not a teeter or totter in sight. He brayed like a donkey at his achievement. A few hours later when I was sitting with him in the playroom and my mom called, he walked on his own toward me to try to wrest the phone away from me. And when I left his play area, I saw him walk unassisted in a circle. And the topper?  Standing by the gate, I saw him turn around and RUN not walk, out of my sight, zipping for the window. I heard his little feet pattering on the floor, again accompanied by peals of laughter.  Hear for yourself in this video I took a little later.

video

This next (and last) video is super short as my memory card decided it was full at the second when he decided to walk to the back of the room. If I ever needed some extra memory cards, today was the day. Sigh!

video

Monday, September 5

Great eggspectations.

Tim scrambled some egg yolks for Chester today.  A little messy but he gobbled it up.  Yay for new proteins!


Friday, September 2

Zaaaaaaaaaa! Ahhhhhhhhhhh!

Today Chester surprised us with an emphatic AAAHHHHHH! It happened while Tim was holding him in one hand while eating pizza in the other. Chester eyed his pizza with big frying pan eyes, opened his mouth and said AHHHHH! Imagine being at the doctor's and being ordered to open up and say AHHHH! That's the noise he made. Over and over. Not sure how he was able to manage eating crusty pizza considering the faces he makes if he eats too big a cluster of rice. Silly little kid!



Cheese and thank you



After countless daily attempts with finger foods - we're talking months and months here - all of which have been unceremoniously dumped onto the floor, we finally made a breakthrough!  Up until now, the only way I could get Chester to eat cheese or fruit was by cutting it into tiny bits and shoving it into the center of his Nutrios.



Today we finally rounded a corner!  I noticed during Chester's dinner, after having missed lunch and being completely weak with hunger that he was greedily eyeing the cheese string I was eating as a last ditch resort.  The next day, I decided to incorporate it into the finger food rotation.  I took the expensive organic goat's milk cheese he's been summarily wasting and cut it into cubes to big to fit a Nutrio.  Then I started to eat a cheese string in front of him which elicited a bunch of sad little whines and protests.  When I tried giving him a piece of the run-of-the-mill supermarket string cheese, he gobbled it up like a starving little mouse!   When I tried substituting the string cheese for the organic goat cheese, he had no problems.  Seems like he's an equal opportunity cheese monster.

YUM!  I LOVE CHEESE!

Um, why haven't you given me this before???

Oops.  Every day you say?  For months?  My bad.

Um, mommy? Please stop taking pics and feed me cheese?

HEY BITCH, DID I STUTTER? FEED ME SOME F*&#KIN' CHEESE NOW!
Thanks mum!