1) Shameless self promotion: Did I add you as a friend so that you could give me updates on what guests will be on your show tomorrow that I should TUNE IN to watch? Do I care that you're on a plane to meet Mark Cuban? Not one little bit.
2) Eye-rolling braggadocio for the sole intent of inducing jealousy: How lovely that you attended Gwen Stefani's NY Fashion Week party last night. "THE party of NY Fashion Week." But seriously, who gives a shit? She sucks anyway. (Sorry - she may have blown up since my encounters with her in the past, but I stand by my statement.)
3) Mindless insipid drivel: "Eatin' blueberries!" That one caused a friend removal.
4) Navel-gazing, nobody-gives-a-shit, let's vomit out our inner monologue to make everyone uncomfortable "Stay tuned for the increasingly poor decisions of (insert person's own name)" and thus trigger an outpouring of sympathetic comments.
5) Insipid shout-outs that piggyback off invitations to events I already RSVP'ed NO to. For the love of Christ, I don't want to attend your fucking DANCE DANCE DANCE party - I've got a newborn for fuck's sakes. Stop counting down the hours to your lame event. (Ok, he's almost 5 months, the word "newborn" goes better with the term "for fuck's sakes", no?)
6) Telling me what you just ate for dinner. This goes hand in hand with #3 but also is meant to inspire feelings of #2. Again, don't care. I'm fine with my Big Mac n' fries. You're just jealous you'd get fat eating 5 of these a week. Should I make that MY status update?
For the record, I like reading updates that are pithy, uproarious, and off-the-cuff. (I don't really post many though. I'm not that uproarious these days.) Interestingly enough, that's pretty much all I've found so far on Twitter. It IS like Facebook, but the very best of it. The type that creates true LOL's. I hope he doesn't mind, but I have to share the picture and caption that broke my Twitter haha hoo-ha: http://yfrog.com/9fcworj
Not sure how long pics last on that site so I'll repost it here. (Please Nathan, don't sue me. No one reads this blog anyway but my boyfriend (when I ask him to) and very seldom, my mother - the pics take too long to load though and she's still getting over her dial-up modem phobia).
The caption reads: In my hotel room: Yeah, right. I'll be using this for birds.
posted by @NathanFillion from Twitter for iPhone 19 hours 23 mins ago
Now, keeping in mind that I have no clue how to use Twitter, I impulsively replied to the tweet:
@NathanFillion TY for making me honestly LOL with this pic. My first on twitter. I recant my prev. biases agnst it. GL w/ season 3!
Is this an ok thing to do? Or is it equivalent to being a mouth-breathing starry-eyed celebstalker? Then I realize that this photo has been viewed over 15,000 times with over 10 pages of comments! Blech! It's official. I have become a slack-jawed stargazer. YAY for me! Considering my background in entertainment, and the fact that I've interviewed many a celeb without ever succumbing to such buffoonery, I'm completely mortified but there's no takebacks. Sure I guess I could erase my tweet but I'll wear this blushing badge to commemorate my inauguration into the Twatterverse - a horrible nickname. But apt today, especially after my gushing turn of events.
Does it really even matter considering no one follows me on Twitter? And no one reads my blog?
Oh. Wait. Sigh...no Tim. I would never leave you for Nathan Fillion.
Oh well. Considering this IS a blog about my child, I guess it would be false advertising for you to come here expecting your Chester fix and have to read this unrelated, completely self-indulgent (kettle!) diatribe, I guess I'll include a couple pics taken yesterday. Wouldn't want to lose my fanbase or anything.
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| Poor purple elly covered in drool. |
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| Cage Match! |
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