The Chester Diaries

Update: The Grocery Store Incident

2012-02-08T17:22:00.000-05:00

After posting about my run-in at the grocery store last week, a couple people took objection, saying I sounded terrible and I should take it down immediately. Suffice it to say, it made me feel like shit. I put a lot of effort into writing the post and was felt I learned something from my less than shining behaviour. I didn't expect that the only thing that would be gleaned from my post was that I yelled/swore at an old person. One person wrote me and said:

Cute things I might have said if I were "Shakey McTurd"/"Shakey
McFuckin' Shakeson" annoyed at you, instead of the dramatics of
head shaking ..
1. ( Pointing to sign reading "Express 1-16 items" and then to 27
items in your cart. )
"What's the matter, lady, can't count, or can't read, or both ?
2. ( After you had dissed me. Approach cashier ..)
" Excuse me, is there a book section ? I would like to purchase
something on anger management as a gift for this young woman. "

They clearly missed the point. If I was informed that it was an express line in the first place, instead of suffering through all the ensuing histrionics, there would be no reason to purchase a book on anger management as there would have been no angry confrontation to begin with. Sigh.

Wanting the opinion of an objective third party, I asked my friend Lena to check out the post. Lena runs a very popular blog, Listen to Lena, which has been named the Best Blog and Best Family Blog at the Canadian Blog Awards for the past two years. Not only did she seem to be the perfect candidate as a busy mother of two and successful blogger, a recent story of hers, A Lesson in Humility, got me to thinking about my own lesson as I was driving home from the grocery store the night of the incident with Shakey.

Not only was Lena gracious enough to take the time to read my long-winded post, she told me she actually laughed her head off and asked if she could share my story with her readers. Even though my post was embarrassing and certainly didn't paint me in a flattering light, a bunch of moms who have no affiliation to me whatsoever would have no qualms about reading me the riot act if they found my actions untenable, right? I agreed immediately and prepared for the blowback. A few days later Lena posted my story on her blog and I received over 500 hits on my blog. We both received many comments on our respective posts. Not only were the majority of responses positive, many women mentioned how much my story them laugh. Whew. Did it exonerate my behaviour with Shakey? No. But I feel better knowing I shared my tale. I owned up to it, took responsibility and hopefully learned from my mistake. In so doing, I also provided a few readers with some comic relief and perhaps a little bit of grocery store protocol. Perhaps a few more people, who considered themselves "Shakeys" might be more inclined to speak up if they see someone taking advantage at an express line in the future. One thing's for sure. I'll always look twice to check to see if I'm in an express lane from now on.

Happy birthday!

2012-01-30T16:58:00.000-05:00

Chester turned 21 months today!

Here are some recent pics taken with my brand new Panasonic Lumix camera.

Kung Hei Fat Choy!

2012-01-29T16:17:00.004-05:00

Off to Dim Sum to celebrate the Year of the Dragon!

Grandma giving Chester an hóngbāo.

WTF am I supposed to do with this?!?

Such a perfect little gentleman right?

Wrong...

Hey kid, it's Year of the Dragon not Year of the Pig!

First World Problems: The Grocery Store Incident

2012-01-26T23:09:00.004-05:00

(Image courtesy of memerial.net)

All my friends say I'm Larry David. Kinda funny considering I'm a woman and neither bald nor old. So to get stuck with this Larry David tag is a bit ridiculous. But if you know me well, it really is apropos. When I'm at a restaurant my order is seldom correct, and it seems wherever I go, trouble naturally ensues. No matter what I'm doing, I'm bound to create a firestorm of controversy. I can't even go to the grocery store without inciting a near riot. Case in point: tonight I'm at Fresh Co. It's late - around 9:30 pm - and the store is nearly empty. At this point, there are more employees on the floor than customers. When I get to the checkout there are only two cashiers. One is serving someone with many items still to go. The other, who just happens to my my favourite cashier, is free and there's not another customer for as far as the eye can see. I reroute and switch to her line. She greets me sweetly and immediately begins to scan my items through. Near the end, I have her price match a few items. (Four to be exact.) Around this point, a woman lines up behind me.

I go through the items quickly and as I'm finishing my last price match, the woman slams her milk bag down onto the conveyer belt as hard as is humanly possible. The heck??? What set her off? My cart is behind me. Intentionally. I do this so weird people without any sense of personal space boundaries don't sidle up beside me and get an eyeful of my PIN. I push my cart towards me, thinking it's possibly standing between her getting her goods onto the conveyer belt? But then I notice an older couple (maybe around 65?) who have now lined up behind her. The man is shaking his head and his wife, who looks like she just sucked on a lemon, is giving me a serious death glare. They are all whispering low and conspiratorially while glancing in my direction.

Now I'm really curious, but I'm also starting to feel really self-conscious and uncomfortable. Am I doing too much price matching? It's not taking any time at all. I have my items organized, my flyers out, the pages ready and the cashier is going through it as fast as I can present them. The whole process takes under a minute so what the heck?!? I still can't figure out why everyone is so irate. I start to bag my groceries while the old woman shoots evil glances my way. Her husband continues to shake his head - to the point I'm wondering if he has some sort of medical condition. Milk Bag Thrower finishes her transaction and leaves in a huff, all the while refusing to look at me which is wise on her part as I'm dying to get to the bottom of this and I'm ready to go toe to toe with her.

The old woman behind her hoists a giant jug of fake cranberry cocktail off the belt and departs, leaving her husband to pay. He gives another head shake while he's punching in his PIN and just when he finishes bagging his groceries, he adds the kicker by throwing one last dramatic head flourish in for good measure before turning to leave. At this point I snap. "What are you shaking your head about?"

He wheels around in a flash. "Well, you're a very rude person."

"ME?!? That's RICH, Shakey. You're the one having a seizure while your wife's been giving me the evil eye. And I'm rude?"

He interjects. "You're in the express lane."

Oops.

Now this is where things could have gone differently. Instead of slamming milk down, head shaking, and pulling a face like you just ate a steaming dog turd, why not just calmly say, "Excuse me, this is the express line." How hard would that have been? But that's not what happened. I have ample reason why the man standing before me has lost an extra two minutes of his life at my hands. Truth be told, I had no clue. I'm tired. It's late. I haven't eaten dinner. I got my period right before I left the house and the cramps are kicking in. Plus I already went grocery shopping the night before so this is the last place I want to be. I just wasn't paying attention and it totally escaped me. Chalk it up to full on mommybrain. An honest (albeit stupid) mistake. But looking at the sour mug on this guy, do you think any of it would compute? And do I really care to offer an excuse after all this bullshit? At this point I'm just angry and there's no way in hell I'm going to apologize. Instead I offer:

"Well, when I got up here, there was no one in line so I can't see how it affected you since I was almost checked out by the time you arrived."

Shakey McTurd just stares and then says, "You've got a bit of an attitude."

"Oh, you THINK??!@????" I fire back.

At this point Shakey realizes he can't win. He turns tail and scurries off in a hurry. I call after him (loudly):

"Hey! Shakey McFuckin' Shakerson?"

Still walking. Ignoring me.

Even louder now. (Ok, yelling.) "Why don't you go and FUCK YOURSELF???"

Not my proudest moment. Or the best of comebacks but that's all I can come up with on short notice.

At any rate, Shakey might have feared for his life, realizing it wasn't smart to poke the bear. He keeps walking and doesn't look back. I turn around to finish bagging my groceries and notice that no one in line is looking at me. They've got their eyes studiously averted. Like I'm that crazy guy in the subway car who you painfully avoid making eye contact with. Oh boy. How embarrassing. I clock the sign above the checkout.

1 - 16 items.

Well hell. Feeling about two inches tall, I turn to the cashier and say quietly, "I'm sorry. I didn't know you were an express line." She comes to life. No sweetness here. "Yes." She says snottily, in a loud voice. "I am."

Really? Now you decide to finally grow a backbone and speak up instead of telling me when I arrived? Jeebus. Favourite cashier status revoked. "Well, I wish you had told me," is all I can manage.

So here's my point: Do I feel good at screaming and cussing out an old man at a grocery store? No. Absolutely not. Would I do it again? Hell yes. And here's why. If you see some boorish asshole in line at the grocery store with 27 items on the belt, namely me - a frazzled tired mom who's starving and feeling like shit - don't bust out the torches and pitchforks and get yourself worked up into an apoplectic fit that you end up popping a vein. Tell the person. Nicely if at all possible. There's a good chance they haven`t a clue. Isn't it better to have someone learn from their mistakes instead of just seething with rage while they continue on completely unaware? By all means, pull the meanest face you can muster, shake your head until it falls off. And if you want to throw down your milk? Knock yourself out. A good loud bang will probably get me to pay attention since the other passive acts of aggression would have gone wholly unnoticed. At least I'll get the satisfaction of knowing your milk will leak all the way home. You'll probably lose sleep over it too and tell everyone about the rude lady in line who went over the limit by 11 items (gasp!) and then SWORE at you. But will you stop to think for even a moment that you could have handled the situation differently? That maybe there were other circumstances at play? Doubtful. If you don't want to be part of the solution, you're just part of the problem. In my case, I shouldn't have let my temper get the best of me but at least I tried to find out what that issue was. I bet most people wouldn't even notice or give a rat's ass.

Xmas 2011

2012-01-06T13:27:00.000-05:00

2012-01-04T12:21:00.000-05:00

Yummy homemade shortbread cookies? HA! I spit on you!

Chester hasn't been eating as much as he normally does as of late. Even worse, he refuses to eat some of his tried and true standbys - french toast, chicken, rice cakes and cheese! He's been a little cheese monster for many months so this turn of events is disconcerting. His molars are coming in so maybe that's the issue. Either way, I found this post which made me feel a bit better:

THE TODDLER DIET

People are always on the lookout for a new diet. The trouble with most diets is that you don't get enough to eat (the starvation diet), you don't get enough variation (the liquid diet) or you go broke (the all-meat diet). Consequently, people tend to cheat on their diets, or quit after 3 days.
Well, now there's the new Toddler Miracle Diet.
Over the years you may have noticed that most two year olds are trim. Now the formula to their success is available to all in this new diet. You may want to consult your doctor before embarking on this diet, otherwise, you may be seeing him afterwards. Good Luck !!!
DAY ONE
Breakfast: One scrambled egg, one piece of toast with grape jelly. Eat two bites of egg, using your fingers; dump the rest on the floor. Take one bite of toast, then smear the jelly over your face and cloth.
Lunch: Four crayons (any color), a handful of potato chips, and a glass of milk (three sips only, then spill the rest).
Dinner: A dry stick, two pennies and a nickel, four sips of flat Sprite.
Bedtime snack: Throw a piece of toast on the kitchen floor.
DAY TWO
Breakfast: Pick up stale toast from kitchen floor and eat it. Drink half bottle of vanilla extract or one vial of vegetable dye.
Lunch: Half tube of "Pulsating Pink" lipstick and a handful of Purina DogChow (any flavor). One ice cube, if desired.
Afternoon snack: Lick an all-day sucker until sticky, take outside, drop in dirt. Retrieve and continue slurping until it is clean again. Then bring inside and drop on rug.
Dinner: A rock or an uncooked bean, which should be thrust up your left nostril. Pour Grape Kool-Aid over mashed potatoes; eat with spoon.
DAY THREE
Breakfast: Two pancakes with plenty of syrup, eat one with fingers, rub in hair. Glass of milk; drink half, stuff other pancake in glass. After breakfast, pick up yesterday's sucker from rug, lick off fuzz, put it on the cushion of best chair.
Lunch: Three matches, peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Spit several bites onto the floor. Pour glass of milk on table and slurp up.
Dinner: Dish of ice cream, handful of potato chips, some red punch. Try to laugh some punch through your nose, if possible.
FINAL DAY
Breakfast: A quarter tube of toothpaste (any flavor), bit of soap, an olive. Pour a glass of milk over bowl of cornflakes, add half a cup of sugar. Once cereal is soggy, drink milk and feed cereal to dog.
Lunch: Eat bread crumbs off kitchen floor and dining room carpet. Find that sucker and finish eating it.
Dinner: Drop pieces of spaghetti onto back of dog, insert meatball into ear. Dump pudding into Kool-Aid and suck up with a straw.
REPEAT DAYS AS NEEDED!

Beanbag Boss

2012-01-03T13:00:00.002-05:00

2012-01-03T12:59:00.000-05:00

We had an amazing time over the holiday season in the new house. I cooked up a storm which included a lot of crock pot dishes, not to mention baked goods like banana bread muffins and chocolate chip cookies. Not that Chester enjoyed eating any of them.

Santa brought me a new camera but I haven't set up the software to download pics but will get to it soon hopefully!

A tree grows in Toronto...

2011-12-21T11:48:00.095-05:00

It seems kind of silly to post the stages of decorating a Christmas tree but since it is our first one in the new house, and my first ever live tree, I thought it worthy of attention.

We started late this year as we weren't sure if we were going to be in town or not until almost mid-December. Now, I don't know much about buying trees or ornaments but I do know that the best time to buy this stuff is after Christmas, or very early in the season so you can shop for the best sales. As such, we had neither option open to us. The best price I could find for an artificial Christmas tree was at Sears which was 60% off a pre-lit 6 footer. But at $399 retail it was still going to be $160. We figured since we were going to be in town we could attend to a live one and I found a great deal at Ikea. $20 for a Fraser fir - and it came with a $20 coupon to use in January. Can't beat free right? Even if we don't get around to using the coupon, it's still a great deal.

The first thing we did was string LED lights. I have to say, this was probably the most frustrating part of the process. First of all, because I have no idea how to string lights (we relied on Dr. Google) and more importantly, brushing up against those needles was painful and sticky! Since I couldn't decide on blue or white we went with a combo. I think next year I'm going to stick to just white. Classic and simple. I couldn't decide on a tree topper so we got a silver star as well as a lighted Santa star to sit a little lower. (Tim hasn't bothered to adjust the star yet as you can see.)

Next came the garlands which I found bit hard to manage. I must say, there's a real art to it and I'm nowhere near mastering it! It looks ghastly here but I played around with it until I was happy with the end result (which came much later.)

Next up. A few of my "keepsake" ornaments. Then the filler items.

I approached the task of decorating the tree much like a fashionable woman would dress herself. Take an urban girl's wardrobe. It's all about hi-lo. The high: designer shoes and handbag, a good jacket, combined with the low - maybe a dress from Zara or H&M, necklace from Banana Republic, tights from Old Navy. In the case of both fashion and my foray into tree decorating, it's hard to tell the high from the low.

Snow Owl: $5 at Pier One. Snowman globe: $2.50 (50% off at Sears ) Purple Noel ball.: Two for $5 at Wal-Mart. Mirrored disco ball: Three for $1 at Dollarama. (They had the same ones at Pier One for a lot more.) Blue and silver crisscross ball, snowflakes, silver and white icicles: $20 for a box of assorted Brian Gluckstein decorations (50% off at Sears.)

The tree toppers weren't expensive either. I bought a $22 silver star at Pier One but didn't like it as much as the $2 one I found at Dollarama (shown below). The lighted Santa star was $10 at Canadian Tire. I didn't think I would like it as much as I do.

The Santa (pictured below) was the priciest item. (A whopping $8 at Pier One.) I didn't want to add any red decorations but c'mon! It's Santa.

Furry woodland creature: $6 at Pier One, Glass snowman: $1 - Dollarama, Silver curlicue: $1 at Wal-Mart, Round snowman: $1 - Dollarama

Green and blue butterfly ball: $5 at Pier One, Smaller balls (far left ribbed blue: $1 - Dollarama, middle purple: $3.50 for 10, and far right blue bell: $5 for an assorted box of colours, Canadian Tire).

Handmade wooden snowman from Austria: $7 at Homesense, Gold drum: $1, set of three, Dollarama.

Reindeer and Snowman: $3 each, Canadian Tire

Reindeer (with scarf): $1, Dollarama. And even though I said I was going to eschew anything primarily red. when I saw the Cars ornaments (set of two for $1, Dollarama) I had to grab them. I hung both balls low on the tree which Chester immediately gravitated towards. He's been enjoying pulling them off and playing with them. Thankfully, both are plastic or I wouldn't have got them.

All in all, I think the decoration was a successful first attempt. Especially since I set out to do a hi-lo themed tree, but really ended up with decorations that were all on the "low" side. I'll be sure to look for nicer pieces on sale come Boxing Day. Now, if only I could get Tim to straighten that star!

Jingle Bells...

2011-12-09T14:42:00.002-05:00

We're a little late in starting in with the festivities but we finally have one.

Our first tree as a family!

After checking out a few other places earlier in the week, Tim finally decided on one that he thought was up to snuff. Believe it or not, it's from Ikea. It was only $20 and it came with a $20 coupon so I'd say that was a pretty sweet deal. Especially considering Tim saw ones for $45 which weren't half as nice. So after running around to get the tree as well as a stand it was pretty late and we had to get Callum to bed, soooo we thought we'd let it stay bare until tonight. Maybe even tomorrow. We still need to hunt for decorations! Lights, a tree skirt, maybe a nice red blanket to lay on the bottom. (Ugh! SO many needles!) I have gotten some filler balls but I'm looking forward to finding some keepsake ornaments. Especially a tree topper. Believe it or not, I've NEVER had a real Christmas tree before so this is kinda all new territory for me. The smell of a real tree is pretty unbelievable. It smells so nice and I swear the air feels fresher but I also have had a headache all day and I'm wondering if the tree has anything to do with it!

I'll post more pics at various stages of tree decoration soon!

Bucket List

2011-12-08T16:39:00.000-05:00

So there's a contest on joeshopping.com which gives you the chance to win a Kindle Fire which I've wanted ever since it came out last month.

So here are a few things that are on my bucket list - in no particular order!

- First off, I would like to successfully publish my book and become a New York Times bestselling author

- I would like to do an "Eat, Pray Love" tour visiting and eating my way through Italy, India and Thailand.

- I would like to hang out in Sweden for a spell and become a super sleuthing spy like Lisbeth Salander in the Girl with the Dragon Tattoo.

- I'd love to go on a whirlwind shopping trip extravaganza to attend Fashion Weeks in New York, London, Paris and Milan - stocking up on the must have pieces of the season from the hottest designer collections.

- To gain enough fame and notoriety to warrant the cover of Rolling Stone - have a team of publicists and assistants on call 24/7 and have a household staff that includes a chauffeur and a personal chef - ideally for both my homes. I'd stock both households with duplicates of all my clothing, books and personal items so I'd never need to pack a bag when I got on my private plane.

What's on your bucket list?

Enter at:

http://www.joeshopping.com/LastChristmasEver/earth/guide

The real poop...

2011-12-06T12:31:00.000-05:00

Yep, he's doing what you think he is...

Baby flop

2011-12-03T00:33:00.000-05:00

Watching him sleep gets me every time.

Chester's first Halloween

2011-10-31T23:20:00.000-04:00

So we decided to go with the lion costume! It fit him much better, and I also added warm layers underneath, complete with scarf that totally went unnoticed.

I liked that he had on proper footwear as well.

Posing outside the homestead.

Time to trick or treat!

Tim got home just in time for the festivities.

Chester met up with our neighbours across the street.

Two little lions.

RAWRRR!

What baby lion cubs eat in their natural habitat...

Tigers as well...

Someone stayed up wayyy past their bedtime.

Costumes, candy. pizza AND a late bedtime? This is the best day ever!

Jack-O

2011-10-31T12:29:00.000-04:00

Busy weekend. Gearing up for Halloween! Our first family pumpkin!

The lion and the meerkat

2011-10-30T21:20:00.000-04:00

I couldn't decide what Callum should go as for Halloween this year. A lion or a meerkat.

The lion costume was from Old Navy. Cheap and cheerful.

When I saw this meerkat costume afterwards on a US website, I just had to jump on it. A plush, much more well made outfit all in all. And since we always call Chester a meerkat, I couldn't resist.

The lion has no feet so it's a better option for going around the neighborhood trick or treating. It's not as warm on it's own however.

The quality of the meerkat costume was significantly higher. However, the outfit is huge on him, and there are "feet" which make it hard to walk around outside.

Curious to know what we wound up with? Check out the next post!

Banana bites

2011-10-30T14:20:00.001-04:00

For Chester's birthday, I thought we'd try to do up some banana pancakes, but more banana than pancake. "Banana Bites."

Pancake batter.

Slice bananas horizontally and dredge in batter.

Tim's version. Not bad!

I took over. Here's my starting batch.

Yum.

A little leftover mix for us adults. With banana sour cream topping. Mmm.

Chester studiously ignoring our creation.

What? More grossness?

Vomitsauce?

If I look cute maybe I can avoid eating this gross slop.

You really can't make me eat it, y'know.

In other news. Look at all my new teeth coming in.

18 months!

2011-10-30T12:20:00.000-04:00

A new take on carrot sticks

2011-10-29T20:14:00.000-04:00

Since I've been having trouble getting Chester to eat veggies, I thought I'd try a new recipe: Carrot Snack Sticks. They're like breadsticks but with carrots and parmesan.

Rolling out the dough.

Cutting it into "sticks."

Lining on parchment paper.

Delish! They taste a bit like Goldfish crackers, but healthy!

Oh did you say healthy? No thanks.

Hmm....the jury's still out.

YOU eat it Daddy!

Foods that are...UCK.

2011-10-27T18:02:00.002-04:00

I tried a bunch of new recipes this week.


Creamed salmon? Ew. I don't care if it's an award winning recipe.

Meatballs?!?

Shitballs is more like it. Keep that cat litter nugget far away from me.

Greenbeans Your Kids Will Love? The recipe LIED mum.

Sweet potato fries gets a thumbs WAY down.

Bottom of the bottle = bottom of the barrel.

2011-10-27T17:55:00.002-04:00

My first foray into fish sticks turned out pretty well.

Blech. More new food?

Oh but it's got a crumb coating. Hmm...

I think you didn't cook up enough!

Happy fish face

The Great Escape

2011-10-26T15:03:00.001-04:00

Someone pushed his Leapfrog Learning Table up against the baby gates in his playroom today...

When he thought I wasn't looking he tried to climb aboard...

When I walked back in he immediately put his leg down and pretended to do something else. Sneaky! I know this table is for learning but this takes it to an entirely different level!

French Toast

2011-10-25T14:06:00.001-04:00

Ding ding ding! It seems we have a winner. I think it may have something to do with only wanting to eat Daddy's food. Hmphf.

Tim's Blue Plate Special. French Toast.

Hm. What is THAT?

Double fisting french toast and milk.

No need to cut it up. I got this.

More! NOW!

My grandma went on vacation...

2011-10-18T23:48:00.002-04:00

Chester's grandma returned from China, which means someone got a new hat. Pigtail and all.

Finger foods

2011-10-18T12:09:00.006-04:00

Chester is a stubborn little cuss. For months and months I've been trying to get him to use his hands to eat.

99.9% of the time he just throws it on the ground. The exception to the rule is eggs and of course, cheese and rice cakes. His tried and true faves.

This week I've been cooking up a storm of homemade foods to force him to expand his repertoire.

First up, Tofu cubes.

These went over better than expected. Probably because he got confused with his cheese cubes that I also dipped in a yummy crumbed coating.

For breakfast I tried him on freshly baked Banana and Blueberry muffins.

No dice. He certainly is enjoying the fruit smoothies I'm making him though. He gets one of his own every day now. He seems to enjoy them. So much so, he had a huge temper tantrum when I set his drink down for a moment (thus interrupting his slurping) to go get a camera so I could snap a few pics.

Next up, Spinach and Cheese nuggets.

These are pretty tasty little guys. However, Chester wasn't really into these. I burnt them ever so slightly but they still tasted great. A casualty from not realizing I had the oven on "convection." Oops. Then I tried Muffin Tin Turkey Loaf. Like Meatloaf but in muffin tins. That's it in the picture below, right at the top, cut into a quarter piece. The turkey muffins went over about as well as a lead balloon.

The picture above also shows a Spinach and Cheese Nuggets on the plate and the one and only saving grace... Homemade Chicken Tenders!

I whipped up a batch of these delectable morsels and they were deelish! I have to admit, it was hard for Tim and I to resist the urge to wolf them all down! And guess what? Ladies and gentlemen, we have a winner!

Chester gobbled these up like a mouse...with cheese. (See how I mixed it into his bowl with some cheese cubes?) It must be the yummy cornflake and parmesan crust. I guess 1 out of 5 dishes is better than nothing, right?

Chilling with Elmo

2011-10-15T23:46:00.000-04:00

'Sup bitch?

Nice start to a Monday...

2011-09-26T12:25:00.005-04:00

So I start my day today and I'm feeling industrious. I decide to get the jump on things and go upstairs to lay out Chester's crib since he had an accident overnight. His crib sheet was already laid out thanks to daddy but I need to set up a clean sleep sack, lovey and arrange his toys. After, I go about my usual morning routine, making a smoothie and getting C's food prepared. I feed him, then go to rinse out his cups. But the kitchen sink is clogged. Again. We thought it was fixed last night. No such luck. We are out of Drano. Great. I try a recipe for a natural drain cleaner I found on Pinterest that calls for distilled vinegar and baking soda. I only have regular vinegar. Ewkay. Um. Does it really matter? Let's give it a shot. The instructions state for you to pour the contents down the drain. Um hello? Didn't anyone get the memo? My drain is clogged. Sigh. I start to bail water. It's not perfect, and I won't be able to bail the damn drain but I do the best I can. I manage to slop dirty sink water on my face, glasses and freshly washed hair. Fuck. I pour the baking soda in, then the vinegar. The contents hiss angrily in the sink. Damn. Imagine what this frothy mess would accomplish in the drain itself? It says to let stand for 30 minutes. I go back to feeding Chester, giving him rice cakes to finish his meal. Afterwards, I put him in his play area for a few while I race madly upstairs and quickly wash my face again.

When I get downstairs, I smell something ungood. C had a poo. From the smell of it, it's a Poomageddon. Sigh. I struggle to get him upstairs as he writhes kicking and shrieking in my arms. This is definitely Pooapalooza. Why is it in when Tim gets the weekend poops, they're always a nice solid mass which are a breeze to clean? This is pudding pop fest, and it's everywhere. Worse yet, C's hand has snaked straight into the corner of the diaper that's leaking. I wet-wipe his hand as best I can and try to keep him from "helping," but he keeps making his business, um, well his business, and continues to rake his hand through the mess. This is the moment I run out of wipes. Oh great. After we are done, I carry him to the sink to wash his hands. But not before he takes his "shit hand" and wipes it across my freshly washed face. Double Fuck.

I wash his hands, put him in his crib, get him in his sleep sack, then deal with that toxic steaming mass of diaper that needs to be contained. I extract the soiled sleeper and bring it to the washroom for Stage 1: Spray the shit out of said sleeper with Resolve. I had put a refill beside the bottle on the weekend hoping Tim would fill it for me. A little trifle for him considering he never has to deal with the grossness of cleaning a soiled piece of clothing. A pretty sweet deal yes? Do you think that the bottle was filled, dear reader? Do you believe my husband so charitable and kind, even grateful, to do me this one small favour? Nope. I know the answer before I even reach for it. The bottle is empty. I fill it, spray the outfit, wash my hands a million times and go back to tuck Chester in bed. By now, the arrangement of toys and blankets I had carefully laid out earlier have been unceremoniously dumped onto the floor.

I throw everything in willy nilly, close the blinds, bid C good nap, and go wash my face. Again. All before noon. I'm exhausted. Just in time to do my workout. I guess it's true what they say. No good deed goes unpunished. That's quite the string of bad luck to kick off the week. Does it get easier?

Finally! No small feet!

2011-09-06T22:07:00.002-04:00

Chester has been walking here and there. It's mostly cruising but there have been many occasions over the last few months where it's clear that he knows how to do it. He just lacks confidence. Every day when Tim is at work I sit in the playroom with him and get him to walk to me. Just a step or two here. Usually if he overthinks it he'll lose his balance. But if he's not worrying about it, he'll do it without any problem. So today I'm happy to say we're finally past the cruising stage! It started first with getting him to walk toward me. It wasn't just a step or two. It was about four or five - and not a teeter or totter in sight. He brayed like a donkey at his achievement. A few hours later when I was sitting with him in the playroom and my mom called, he walked on his own toward me to try to wrest the phone away from me. And when I left his play area, I saw him walk unassisted in a circle. And the topper? Standing by the gate, I saw him turn around and RUN not walk, out of my sight, zipping for the window. I heard his little feet pattering on the floor, again accompanied by peals of laughter. Hear for yourself in this video I took a little later.

This next (and last) video is super short as my memory card decided it was full at the second when he decided to walk to the back of the room. If I ever needed some extra memory cards, today was the day. Sigh!

Great eggspectations.

2011-09-05T23:36:00.002-04:00

Tim scrambled some egg yolks for Chester today. A little messy but he gobbled it up. Yay for new proteins!

Zaaaaaaaaaa! Ahhhhhhhhhhh!

2011-09-02T23:39:00.000-04:00

Today Chester surprised us with an emphatic AAAHHHHHH! It happened while Tim was holding him in one hand while eating pizza in the other. Chester eyed his pizza with big frying pan eyes, opened his mouth and said AHHHHH! Imagine being at the doctor's and being ordered to open up and say AHHHH! That's the noise he made. Over and over. Not sure how he was able to manage eating crusty pizza considering the faces he makes if he eats too big a cluster of rice. Silly little kid!

Cheese and thank you

2011-09-02T23:31:00.004-04:00

After countless daily attempts with finger foods - we're talking months and months here - all of which have been unceremoniously dumped onto the floor, we finally made a breakthrough! Up until now, the only way I could get Chester to eat cheese or fruit was by cutting it into tiny bits and shoving it into the center of his Nutrios.

Today we finally rounded a corner! I noticed during Chester's dinner, after having missed lunch and being completely weak with hunger that he was greedily eyeing the cheese string I was eating as a last ditch resort. The next day, I decided to incorporate it into the finger food rotation. I took the expensive organic goat's milk cheese he's been summarily wasting and cut it into cubes to big to fit a Nutrio. Then I started to eat a cheese string in front of him which elicited a bunch of sad little whines and protests. When I tried giving him a piece of the run-of-the-mill supermarket string cheese, he gobbled it up like a starving little mouse! When I tried substituting the string cheese for the organic goat cheese, he had no problems. Seems like he's an equal opportunity cheese monster.

YUM! I LOVE CHEESE!

Um, why haven't you given me this before???

Oops. Every day you say? For months? My bad.

Um, mommy? Please stop taking pics and feed me cheese?

HEY BITCH, DID I STUTTER? FEED ME SOME F*&#KIN' CHEESE NOW!

Thanks mum!

16 months!

2011-08-30T23:33:00.005-04:00

Chester turned 16 months old today. Here are some pictures of him this morning.

Chillin in his toddler chair this afternoon.

Mr. Muffet on his tuffet.

Time to get outta dodge.

Over the last few months, his hair is becoming incredibly curly in the back!

He's loving his playroom.

Of course, not as much as he loves mummy's iPad. He even knows how to unlock the darn thing. Hopefully he won't get ahold of my iTunes password and put me in the poorhouse!

15 months!

2011-07-30T23:38:00.000-04:00

Good morning! I'm 15 months old today!

New ride!

2011-07-29T22:50:00.000-04:00

So we picked up our new vehicle today. After a month of researching, comparison shopping and suffering through shady salespeople, we finally settled on a Hyundai Santa Fe. It had everything we were looking for and it was a great deal! This is Chester on the way to Ikea. Looks impressed, no?

I'm happy to report that all the furniture we have been wanting to buy for the last few months easily fit into the back of the SUV. No problem at all. Tim said the passenger seat snapped down like a dream. I had to sit in the front though which was a first. Chester and I are so used to hanging together in the back. He squalled all the way home!

First steps!

2011-07-12T23:27:00.002-04:00

Sorry for the long delay between posts. We have been in full settling in/home reno mode and it's been pretty busy around here!

One major milestone happened today when Chester took his first steps this afternoon. These photos were taken the day before but they pretty much show exactly how it happened.

After Tim and I were able to get out on our own for a romantic getaway...to Costco (LOL) Chester was super excited to see us. He is especially fascinated by the front door.

Basically, his first steps consisted of him exactly in the position you see in the last photo above. He turned around and took about three steps to me, laughing and thrilled at his accomplishment. Although he has taken many little steps from one object to another (ie: table to couch) this was the first where there was nothing between him, which required more than one step. Tim was in the kitchen putting away groceries while I was playing with him at the door. I would have loved to have had my camera but it happened so suddenly!

Getting along swimmingly.

2011-07-09T23:38:00.000-04:00

We always enjoy our visits to see Frank, Lori and Maya in their lovely home.

Frank set up a little pool in their backyard which couldn't have been more perfect for Chester's first foray into water that wasn't in a sink or a tub!

He especially liked the scenery. I think our son has a thing for older women! Just like his daddy! lol...

OMG! Gurlz are hawt!

Dazzled by Maya's beauty...

Time to cool off mister!

Before his time

2011-06-10T11:10:00.000-04:00

My friend Spero came by to check out the new digs. He also brought over a belated birthday present for little C.

Tongue out. Total concentration.

Ok, technically he hasn't even started walking yet but BOY, does he love it!

Look ma, no hands!

Thanks to Spero for the very sweet gift!

Pick me a winner...

2011-06-04T11:12:00.000-04:00

So as you can tell from the corresponding pic, Chester has developed a new hobby...

He doesn't really go on an - ahem, expedition, mind you. He just likes to insert his finger into his nose and leave it there. It's a little disturbing at home, but yesterday when we were out looking at dining room tables, he decided to treat customers to his new talent. The finger went up and stayed up! I was mortified!!! He quite enjoyed the look on my face. I think that made him want to prolong his little show even more.

First steps?

2011-06-01T21:11:00.004-04:00

Chester was extremely cranky tonight.

He HATES the playpen but ever since we put it in the dining room displaying that huge evergreen, he's been happy as a clam. Until today. The little guy just wasn't having it and he made it clear to everyone within a 5 mile radius!

But that's not the reason for this post. (If that was the case, I'd have to post multiple times each day!) In between crying jags, Chester WALKED from one side of his playpen to the other! Ok, it was only a couple steps but that's why they call it the "first steps" right? Plus, he did it without holding on to anything. In fact, it could have easily been missed since he didn't fall or make a big deal of it AT ALL. I don't know if it actually counts since he had such a short amount of space and didn't need to muster up any courage to really walk, but we'll count it as a precursor to the real thing for now. I think we're close. Prepare for all hell to break loose!

The grass is always greener...

2011-05-30T12:35:00.004-04:00

It's taken over a month but we are finally getting used to the city-free sounds of our new home. Streetcar bells, loud drunks and the loutish intrusion of rude neighbours have now been replaced with chirping birds, the rumble of the garbage truck passing through, as well as the cacophony of lawn mowers humming on a Saturday morning.

Add to that, a sight I never thought I'd see.

Tim tackles the lawn with glee.

He already mowed it the week before!

Apparently it needs to be done every week or it "looks like shit."

Whups! A little trip and this garden bunny keeps right on going.

Also, words I never thought I'd hear. Tim: "I can't wait to cut the lawn this weekend." If you know Tim, especially anything about his childhood having to cut the family lawn, this is truly a momentous occasion. I guess life really is full of surprises!

May days

2011-05-19T11:58:00.002-04:00

My eight teeth!

Things have been busy around here so not much time to post. Quite frankly, I'm considering hanging up this blog soon. (It does take up a great deal of work and there's little in the way of response here as the dearth of followers and comments suggest.) Not to worry though, I'll still update with pictures every so often at the very least.

First runny nose...kinda cute for a snot nosed kid right?

This week Chester and I have been sick. We both had a cold that I was able to fight off after a few days. One of the benefits of breastfeeding still is that C has a much better chance to resist nasty cold bugs. I've been taking echinacea and Vitamin C right before nursing which helped him immensely. We seemed to both have the same exact symptoms too. Runny nose (only on one side of the face), extreme thirst and a dry throat. We are doing better though and starting to feel more settled in. Here are a few pics taken last night. Seems like C is developing a bit of a foot fetish like his Grandma.

A big foot in a little mouth. (Same mouth as his dad.)

Sick day...

2011-05-05T23:00:00.005-04:00

Chester woke up this morning with bright pink cheeks and a fever. At first, I thought the fever was from the vaccinations he had on Monday. The doctor did mention that this could happen. However, his nose has been running all day. He was also yawning all morning and just low energy. I think our little boy is sick. It's his first time. I guess not getting sick for a year is something, right?

Why HEY stranger! Who are you?

How lovely it was to see Tim home a little early from work with a present for him. A Fisher Price Go Baby Go! Stride-to-Ride Dino! We've wanted this for such a long time and it was so nice to see Chester's face when he saw a belated, extra bday/sorry-you're-sick-please-feel-better-soon present waiting for him!

Hello! I think we're going to be best friends.

Totally mesmerized.

C was imitating the dino's roar!

In no time he was standing and exploring.

And tasting...

Blurry shot but C's face = pure joy.

I think the smiles and shrieks we got as a result of his new toy took his mind off feeling icky. What a nice surprise!

One Year!

2011-04-30T23:59:00.007-04:00

Happy birthday to Chester who turned one today! Here are some pics of the main event. What a fun day!

Good morning! I'm a big boy today!!!

Organic yummy cake I made for the occasion! Never baked a cake before!


The gluten-free cake had 2 layers filled with raisins, carrots and sunflower seeds.

Sweet potato frosting with maple syrup and cinnamon.

Thanks to Tim's Uncle Ron and Aunt Trish for the amazing blender!

My mom brought the chocolate-y goodness for the big kids!

Not happy about wearing the funny hat.

Uhh...what hat? GIMME CAKE!!!

Not sure I dig this...maybe if it was shaped like a boob?

Hmm...the frosting is YUM.

Wait?!? Am I feeding myself???

Ok, i'm seriously DIGGING this. Time to have some fun!

Do you think I could get any messier?


New toy from Grandma and Uncle Tony.

Enjoying his loot!

Loves Thomas the Tank!

My mom reading him a poem she wrote for C's big day.

Thanks to everyone who made the day so wonderful. Chester appreciated all the presents and well wishes. We love you!

New house pics!

2011-04-27T16:57:00.001-04:00

Apologies for the delay in posts. I think this is the longest I've ever gone without posting. The past few weeks have been Moving Hell. Thankfully, we are now past that, onto the annoying and all-consuming Unpacking Hell. Here are some pics in the new house! These were all taken today in the dining room which overlooks a huge tree. (It must be at least 40 feet tall.) For some reason Chester was fascinated with the scenery and didn't kick up any fuss at all when I put him in baby jail. (A first.)

WTF is that big green furry thing?!?

Why, hello!!!

Whoa, that thing is maybe as tall as Grampy.

Quick, let's make a break for it!!!

Murphy's Law

2011-04-11T13:35:00.002-04:00

Never fails. When I need some time to myself to get things done, Chester, like clockwork, will wake up early from his nap. After an hour. Maybe less. However, on the rare occasion, I need to get out and about to get things done, or in this case, have people over, this kid will stay asleep for HOURS on end! Here he is more than 2 hours into his nap without any signs of stirring.

Movin' on Up

2011-04-07T23:36:00.001-04:00

WE'RE MOVING! Mum and Dad bought me a HOUSE!

After projectile vomiting all over myself in the car, a shoe hits the spot...

Checking out the new digz with Dad.

WOOHOO!!! Free at last!!!

What the heck is THAT on the floor?!?

OOH FUZZIE!

NOM NOM! TASTY FUZZIES!

Yawn...Time to go home and sleep.

WTF??? It's just a little BARF. WHY DID I HAVE TO BATHE?!!

Well, at least I look good!!!

Break on through...

2011-04-04T16:32:00.002-04:00

Chester has new buddies. The two teeth on either side of his front teeth have broken through. I've been trying to get a pic but this camera just isn't equipped with a fast enough lens/zoom. (I HATE IT!) *stomp* *kick* *whine*

Eventually I'll get it but for now, these are the best I could do.

This last pic is the best as you can see a little bit of that new tooth peeking out.

Lazy Sunday car ride

2011-04-03T16:37:00.003-04:00

Chester looking less than impressed in his COOL fisherman's peacoat. It's the first time he's worn it - and sadly, probably one of the only times he'll get the opportunity considering our Canadian weather. One minute it's snowing, the next it's Spring and everyone's in shorts!

10 month recap

2011-03-31T12:57:00.006-04:00

Last night as a 10 month old.

Our baby turned 11 months only yesterday and it's pretty hard to believe that almost a year has passed already! To think that he'll be running around soon - and in a new house, no less, is pretty exciting. Guess I need to ramp up my exercise routine or our little ball of energy is going to leave me in the dust!

Say CHEESE!

This month, Chester welcomed a few new guests to his mouth. He seems to have a little family of teeth now. In fact, our dentist checked him out when Tim and I went for our appointments on Monday. (For the last few years, Tim and I usually book our checkups together, but this time we did them back to back so one of us could hold the monster.)


Sitting pretty on Toy Mountain. (Formerly known as the couch)

I was surprised when the dentist said he would like to take a look at Chester since he has such few teeth. The dentist said it's a good idea to check just to see how his mouth is looking, as it could prevent problems in the future. He came out to the reception area and had a look right there on the spot and proclaimed Chester's mouth to be "beautiful." He said he spotted 8 teeth, even though only 5 have come through. Along with the toothbrush and floss the dentist always gives us at every checkup, he also included a baby toothbrush and a little kit which includes a teether. We're now supposed to brush his teeth every night before bed. I was also told not to give him sweet food at night, which is actually fine since I always start his morning with it. Our hygienist also said that breast milk contains sugar so it's definitely a good thing to brush before putting him to sleep.

I am the master of this remote. MINE!

Fastest draw in the West.

Why do you PVR Jersey Shore? PHHBBBTTH!!!

On a more "entertaining" note, Chester is getting pretty adept with the remote. He always knows which way to point it at the television. In fact, I've tested this many times by handing it to him by the wrong end. He'll automatically turn it the right way to point and click! His favourite channels? MuchVideo, Rogers on Demand (can't wait until he starts ordering movies, yikes!) as well as the Reality Channel, Christian Channel, and the Punjabi Network.

Chester is up to three squares a day. We've introduced a bunch of different new foods including basmati rice and lentils. And it's always a big, crying mess when the food runs out.

With that face? Try taking this jar away...

Broccoli and lentils. Who knew he'd LOVE such yucky sounding food?

I don't think he's actually still hungry most of the time. It's just his way of saying he WANTS it. Just like he wants the remote, and the new magazine that's just WAITING to be torn up, or a story book.

Hooray for Fish!

Speaking of stories, he's finally really digging them. I've been reading to him for months and I might as well be talking to myself for all the interest he's shown. Nowadays he gets super stoked when it's time for a story. He'll hyperventilate and give us the biggest smiles. It truly makes my heart melt.

PEEK-A-BOO!

Other things of note - his head control is definitely improving. There's a lot less gonking in the crib and we've actually seen him catch himself when he's starting to fall, so that's a bit of a relief. He's still doing it on occasion but I suspect that's more for dramatic effect to get out of taking a nap.

Winding Chester up before bed.

Definitely not mom sanctioned.

Speaking of naps, I've already mentioned this in previous posts but the most exciting thing EVER?

Chester is finally taking regular naps in his crib in the day! I would call that a LANDMARK achievement! I can't tell you what amazing freedom it is to be able to have the run of the house! I get to actually answer the door, make a phone call, even have a meal, without tiptoeing around. (Not that I'd even DARE to try to make something to eat before.) I was seriously worried about what we were going to do when we moved, but I think the crib napping bodes well for a positive outcome in our new place. (Crossing fingers!)

11 months!

2011-03-30T11:19:00.002-04:00

Happy 11 months to baby Chester who isn't such a little baby anymore! Only one month left of being an infant. Kinda amazing that he's going to be a year old next month! This will be the last photo of him in his crib in his current place. Next month, we'll be in our new home! As you can see, it's impossible to get a picture of him lying in his crib, nevermind even sitting!

Bust me outta this jail already!

Maybe next month, no hands?

If I tune you out maybe you'll let me sleep in the big boy bed.

Today's been an interesting day so far in the way of milestones. This morning before he had his first feeding, we heard his little tummy rumble. (too cute!) And as of this afternoon, he's managed to call his daddy twice. Once at work, once on his cell. He's also hung up once too. LOL.

Whistlin' Dixie

2011-03-24T19:03:00.000-04:00

Chester was fascinated watching his Daddy whistle today.

What the heck is coming out of your mouth Dad?!?

Yikes! Make it stop!

Great distraction for stealing glasses.

Ok time to shut it.

Chester > whistling

This hasn't been the first time Chester has busted out this move. He's had good practice on his Sing-a-Ma-Jig

Shut yer hole!

Look Ma, no hands!

2011-03-24T16:03:00.000-04:00

Breakthrough!

2011-03-22T16:45:00.004-04:00

Passed out on his face today in his crib. Yay!

I've been trying to get Chester to fall asleep for naps in his crib during the day for many months now. He's always kicked up such a big stink, leaving the both of us exhausted, I just gave up. However, in the last few weeks, we decided we needed to revisit Chester's naptime. With our impending move, Tim and I need to pack which means the current arrangement of Chester sleeping in the living room for hours while we tiptoe around in the bedrooms just doesn't work. Two weekends ago we tried and the results were mixed. On Saturday, (March 12th) he slept for almost 2 hours. From 2 pm until almost 4! The next day? Well, not so good...He slept about 40 minutes. From 2:50 until 3:30. On Monday when we tried, he refused to nap at all and cried bitterly for about an hour.

After generally poor results, I gave it the week and resumed living room sleeping but tried again on the weekend. Amazingly, both Saturday and Sunday he slept without any problem in his crib! On Saturday from 1:30 until almost 4 and on Sunday from 1:50 until 4:15. I still feel bad that we are reducing his naps to only one a day when he isn't even a toddler yet, but he does need to learn to sleep in his crib in the new house so it's good he's learning now.

The best thing of all? He napped in his crib today without Tim being here! I kept thinking Tim was the X factor and it was some karmic law that decreed it not possible for me to have any peace whatsoever. Well today, I tried putting him in his crib on my own and he slept like a rock. I put him in his crib at 1:04 - he screamed bloody murder for about, oh a minute, and then passed out on his face. I actually had the run of the house to myself for the first time in...I can't remember! He's started stirring at around 4:30 but is now sitting up in his crib while I type at 4:45. Here's a pic of the little guy playing quietly right now.

3 1/2 hours later. Awake without any drama.

Toy Story

2011-03-16T22:20:00.010-04:00

Some pics of Chester with his favourite toys.

Scout.

I bought him so he could fall asleep during his crib in the day.

No dice.

The lion he loves to throw off his high chair.

Fave turtle. Also a rattle.

Camo bear and new friend Milo the dog.

Little jangly lion who he loves to throw down.

First Xmas present from Dad. (surprise surprise...)

Separated at birth seahorse.

This toy gave him a reason to crawl...

Looking at himself in the mirror.

His monkey cell-mate in BABY JAIL.

Standing order

2011-03-11T22:16:00.000-05:00

Some pics of Chester's new favourite thing to do. Climb the chair and stand like a Meerkat.

Horrible Day

2011-03-09T16:04:00.001-05:00

I woke up this morning completely unable to move my head. My neck is in such severe pain and it hurts to breathe. Trying to move/lift/change a baby is really an unfathomable proposition. Yet that's what I had to do since Tim didn't even consider taking the day off work. I really needed Chester to take a nap so I decided not to try for 2, today since it seems to only yield one bad one and skipping over the second one entirely. I began getting him ready at 12:30. It's now 4 pm and he's still sitting, bright eyed with no nap in sight! That's more than 3 hours wasted. I feel like I'm in HELL. Add in the constant crying and whining and I'm about ready to kill myself. I've fed him twice and changed him...gave him stuff for teething. Frustrated beyond belief. Pretty much the worst day I have had since he was a 5 month old.

Stubborn little so and so rubbing his eyes but refusing to nap.

New friend...

2011-03-08T16:08:00.000-05:00

Chester has a new visitor. A new tooth has popped up alongside his bottom two.

His top two seem to have really broken through now as well.

Cry me a River

2011-03-04T20:26:00.003-05:00

Lots of crying in the past couple of weeks. Everything ends in bitter tears. It's that raw, full volume crying that makes you drop things. And it goes on for looong periods of time all throughout the day. Not sure if it's teething or what the deal is. But there are tried and true times when he can be counted on to turn in a great performance. This kid definitely should be up for an Academy Award!

Take his feeding sessions. For the last few days every meal ends in a huge crying jag when I take the jar away. He went from half a jar a feeding only two weeks ago to almost a full one every day this week! And he still cries no matter how much you give him. The only way to make him stop crying is to distract him. If he sees the jar taken away, he'll wail. And if he's still just slightly hungry, he'll cry. Taking the jar away when he isn't looking won't work. Don't even try. I did a little demonstration on video. Seeing is believing after all.

Now that Chester can stand, it's all he can do to sit still. Here he is standing up in his playpen today. A minute before I started recording, he whacked his head pretty good and I put him down on his butt so he wouldn't hurt himself again. That didn't go over well. He has absolutely has no interest in sitting or keeping his head safe. Now it's just standing, falling, banging head. Rinse and repeat. Would it be bad if I bought him a baby helmet?

Standing Tall

2011-03-03T22:56:00.005-05:00

We've had to move Chester's crib settings down TWICE in the last month. After I saw him pulling himself up to sit on his knees I got worried he could possibly fall out. So Tim moved it down.

Starting to pull himself up in January.

Then he did something amazing (and scary) on Tuesday. He STOOD for the first time by himself!

Sitting is for the birdz...

I heard him laughing like a hyena and I asked Tim who was in the room with him what was going on. Tim told me to come and see. This is what I found when I walked in...

Braying like a donkey at his impressive accomplishment!

HEY LOOK IT'S THE FLOOR!

HMMM...WONDER IF I CAN GIVE MY MAMA A HEART ATTACK..

I actually got so scared when I saw this I surrounded the crib with every available padded surface I could find for two nights. Then tonight, Tim moved the crib down to its third and final notch. Now I might actually be able to rest easy and get some sleep!

Um...why is my head so FAR DOWN???

I can't see over the crib now? This is some BULLSHITZ!

When I get out of this crib I'm gonna kill you all...

Um..hello?!? This makes DJ'ing kinda hard!!!

So he's safe from falling on the floor. Now I only have to worry about him pitching backwards and GONKING himself in the head. Sigh.

Kissing up.

2011-03-03T09:53:00.001-05:00

Chester has started to figure out kissing. I shower him with them enough. It's finally dawning on him what they are. Now, when I give him one, he knits his brows, purses his lips and is totally aware of his mouth. He'll even stick out his tongue which abruptly ends the smooch-fest.

The picture below is a first which Tim actually caught on film this morning! I pursed my lips to get a kiss and Chester leaned in and kissed me on his own!

10 months!

2011-03-01T20:17:00.006-05:00

Chester didn't have his 10 month anniversary since there is no 30th in the month of February but a lot has happened in the last 28 days!

One of the hardest things have been his two front teeth coming in.

There's actually quite a few more coming in besides the top two. Bleh. This is going to be fun.

We visited his naturopath this month. She was amazed at how BIG he's gotten in the last three months. She said his weight is in the 60th percentile and his height is in the 80th percentile. It's not the first time we've heard that he's going to be tall.

Other than that, he's become a little octopus. It's almost impossible to hold him when we're sitting on the couch after a feeding. He wants to grab everything and he's just so wriggly! Since he's officially too big to sit in the Bumbo now and I don't like to have him sit in his crib since he always manages to hit his head pretty hard, he's been getting some mileage out of his playpen.

Out with the old...

and in with the new...BABY JAIL!!!

So far he's been enjoying sitting in there but I suspect that will change pretty fast when he realizes he's just a prisoner whose civil rights are being violated. Going to put the phone in there with him so he can call Kids Help Phone.

The old days: Nice long AM nap.

Besides teething, the only major transition has been naptime. He's been amazing the last few months with two naps a day - a morning one in his rocker and a later afternoon in his swing. I knew my luck would run out sooner or later.

Fresh and happy!

He's able to fall asleep quickly for his morning nap - but the afternoon? Fuggedaboudit. I sit sometimes for an hour, even two, while he refuses to sleep. Super frustrating. I'm now experimenting with one longer nap in the early afternoon.

What nap? Sleep is for the weak!

It's basically a toddler nap but it's come a few months early. The times I've tried it he's slept for anywhere from 3 to 4 hours which is just as good, if not better than the 40 to 90 minute morning nap and the 2 to 3 hour late afternoon.

Oh..you wanted to work? I'm the only job worth doing!!!

Cauliflopper

2011-02-18T13:53:00.005-05:00

Our first outing with the Beaba was a complete success in the form of butternut squash.

Cauliflower? Meh. Not so much!

All I can say about this next reaction is, WOW! I guess there's a first time for everything. Pardon the shaky camera and wheezing. Apparently, kids making funny faces while eating turns me into a 90 year old man with emphysema.

Crazy about Marilyn (sort of)

2011-02-17T14:57:00.001-05:00

Not sure if it's because Chester is bored with his food or just easily distracted but I can't have cartoons or kids shows on when I'm feeding him. I usually throw on the Marilyn Denis show to see if any of my friend Barb's segments are on. Bad mistake. Every time I do, Chester's head whips around like the Exorcist. It always happens when they're headed in or out of commercials. Something in the music fascinates him.

Whoa! Forget food. What's this mum?

Evil network TV has me in its clutches!

Um...what is this shit? Really? Women chattering? REALLY???

UGH! Make it stop already. Cue the music!

Sprout Right

2011-02-16T22:26:00.003-05:00

Chester has been on solid foods for over three months now. He's a good eater but he's starting to get bored.

So...what's for dinner?

Blech. Pears again?

Luckily, our Christmas gift from my mom and Tony came in really handy. The Beaba Babycook allows you to make your own baby food. It steams and purees it for you which is a really nice feature as a lot of nutrients are lost boiling and transferring vegetables. This process allows minimal transfer which means maximum yumminess. We gave the babycook a whirl for the first time tonight and were really happy with the results.

Butternut squash!

We made Butternut squash and cauliflower which I then transferred to Baby cubes and froze.

The little monster taste testing...

The verdict? NOM NOM NOM! YUMZ!

Sad panda.

2011-02-15T23:30:00.002-05:00

Chester has been extremely cranky this week. It's been a tough one. The teething is pretty bad. You'll see evidence of this in a couple days when you see the photos! In the meantime, I've been wanting to make a hat for him for months now. To be exact, this panda hat. I've knit the hat portion. I just have to do the ears. Here are the pics we managed to get in the split second between putting this hat on Chester's head and him ripping it off.

Aww...QQ Panda.

Note the red blotches. (Teething!)


I left the string on for now. Keeping it DIY!

Our little pin-up boy doing his best Rita Hayworth impression.

I'll post a finished hat when I get the wool for the ears. However, this particular yarn doesn't come in black so this is going to be one funny looking panda!

Year of the Rabbit

2011-02-13T23:17:00.001-05:00

Every year, it's been a tradition in our family to celebrate Chinese New Year at our favorite restaurant. This year, we had to put the kybosh on our get together as Chester is at the stage where he can't be trusted not to scream his head off. The place we like to go also doesn't have the best baby changing facilities (meaning none.) So my mom and Tony came by tonight for a little Chinese New Year visit.

One of the newest (and crappy) developments now that I'm a mom is that I officially don't get an "ang pao" anymore. An "ang pao" is an envelope containing a gift of money. It is always in a red envelope which symbolizes luck. When you have a child or get married, you don't get them anymore. Boo for me. Yay for Chester though. He had the honour of receiving his first ever!

First ever lucky envelope.

The symbol on the envelope means "Fu" or "Luck."

Mmm. Luck is tasty.

Best. Toy. Ever.

2011-02-09T15:44:00.000-05:00

Chester has always gone at his bouncer pretty hard. He really stomps it out. Now, we're seeing the fallout from all this bouncing.

Chester noticed a new friend tonight. A little hole in the foot of his sleeper.

I saw it and thought, "HEY! Just like your dad!"

The kid already has a fascination with his toes so seeing it on display in such a fashion provided an endless source of fascination.

Maybe we don't need to buy that Stride to Ride Dino after all. =)

Movin' Time

2011-02-03T15:29:00.005-05:00

If you've noticed the dearth of posts lately, it's for the simple fact that things have been really hectic! We've been looking for a new place for the last few months since our living quarters are getting kinda cramped. Chester needs room to move! And right now, our place isn't babyproofed. It's like a baby minefield so it's time to go! We'll be moving in April, but in the meantime, the little guy can't wait.

Rude Boy

2011-02-03T11:29:00.001-05:00

Chester's started to make lovely farting sounds with his mouth. It's quite funny to listen to. Until of course, you are on the receiving end of such "noises." Very sloppy. As much as I love getting sprayed in the face with slobber, I'm going to hope that this new development is just a phase.

Faceplant splitsville...

2011-01-26T23:36:00.003-05:00

Chester has been screaming himself to sleep for the last few nights. I want to go in and hug him but Tim says doing that will just make it worse. Sigh. He finally passes out but it's never pretty. He basically sits on his butt and wails, until he pitches forward on his face, legs splayed and passes out.

Here's a picture of him in the baby monitor tonight.

We usually go in and change his position but soon after this was taken he shifted to his side. I'd like to think it's progress but I'm chalking it up to a fluke this time!

11 Step Program for those thinking of having kids MUST READ!!!!!

2011-01-21T08:25:00.008-05:00

My friend emailed me this "guide" last week. It's hilarious and oh so true. Scared to experience some of the later things. LOL!

**************************************************************

Lesson 1

1. Go to the grocery store.
2. Arrange to have your salary paid directly to their head office.
3. Go home.
4. Pick up the paper.
5. Read it for the last time.

Lesson 2
Before you finally go ahead and have children, find a couple who already are parents and berate them about their...
1. Methods of discipline.
2. Lack of patience.
3. Appallingly low tolerance levels.
4. Allowing their children to run wild.
5. Suggest ways in which they might improve their child's breastfeeding, sleep habits, toilet training, table manners, and overall behavior.
Enjoy it because it will be the last time in your life you will have all the answers.

Lesson 3
A really good way to discover how the nights might feel...
1. Get home from work and immediately begin walking around the living room from 5PM to 10PM carrying a wet bag weighing approximately 8-12 pounds, with a radio turned to static (or some other obnoxious sound) playing loudly. (Eat cold food with one hand for dinner)
2. At 10PM, put the bag gently down, set the alarm for midnight, and go to sleep.
3. Get up at 12 and walk around the living room again, with the bag, until 1AM.
4. Set the alarm for 3AM.
5. As you can't get back to sleep, get up at 2AM and make a drink and watch an infomercial.
6. Go to bed at 2:45AM.
7. Get up at 3AM when the alarm goes off.
8. Sing songs quietly in the dark until 4AM.
9. Get up. Make breakfast. Get ready for work and go to work (work hard and be productive)
Repeat steps 1-9 each night. Keep this up for 3-5 years. Look cheerful and together.

Lesson 4
Can you stand the mess children make? T o find out...
1. Smear peanut butter onto the sofa and jam onto the curtains.
2. Hide a piece of raw chicken behind the stereo and leave it there all summer.
3. Stick your fingers in the flower bed.
4. Then rub them on the clean walls.
5. Take your favorite book, photo album, etc. Wreck it.
6. Spill milk on your new pillows. Cover the stains with crayons. How does that look?

Lesson 5
Dressing small children is not as easy as it seems.
1. Buy an octopus and a small bag made out of loose mesh.
2. Attempt to put the octopus into the bag so that none of the arms hang out.
Time allowed for this - all morning.

Lesson 6
Forget the BMW and buy a mini-van. And don't think that you can leave it out in the driveway spotless and shining. Family cars don't look like that.
1. Buy a chocolate ice cream cone and put it in the glove compartment. Leave it there.
2. Get a dime. Stick it in the CD player.
3. Take a family size package of chocolate cookies. Mash them into the back seat. Sprinkle cheerios all over the floor, then smash them with your foot.
4. Run a garden rake along both sides of the car.

Lesson 7
Go to the local grocery store. Take with you the closest thing you can find to a pre-school child. (A full-grown goat is an excellent choice). If you intend to have more than one child, then definitely take more than one goat. Buy your week's groceries without letting the goats out of your sight. Pay for everything the goat eats or destroys. Until you can easily accomplish this, do not even contemplate having children.

Lesson 8
1. Hollow out a melon.
2. Make a small hole in the side.
3. Suspend it from the ceiling and swing it from side to side.
4. Now get a bowl of soggy Cheerios and attempt to spoon them into the swaying melon by pretending to be an airplane.
5. Continue until half the Cheerios are gone.
6. Tip half into your lap. The other half, just throw up in the air.
You are now ready to feed a nine- month-old baby.

Lesson 9
Learn the names of every character from Sesame Street , Barney, Disney, the Teletubbies, and Pokemon. Watch nothing else on TV but PBS, the Disney channel or Noggin for at least five years. (I know, you're thinking What's 'Noggin'?) Exactly the point.

Lesson 10
Make a recording of Fran Drescher saying 'mommy' repeatedly. (Important: no more than a four second delay between each 'mommy'; occasional crescendo to the level of a supersonic jet is required). Play this tape in your car everywhere you go for the next four years. You are now ready to take a long trip with a toddler.

Lesson 11
Start talking to an adult of your choice. Have someone else continually tug on your skirt hem, shirt- sleeve, or elbow while playing the 'mommy' tape made from Lesson 10 above. You are now ready to have a conversation with an adult while there is a child in the room.

This is all very tongue in cheek; anyone who is parent will say 'it's all worth it!' Share it with your friends, both those who do and don't have kids. I guarantee they'll get a chuckle out of it.
Remember, a sense of humor is one of the most important things you'll need when you become a parent!

**************************************************************

Funny right? But I thought I should add a couple of my own...

Lesson 12: Get an ear examiner. Visit the ear examiner every day for the next five years.

Lesson 13: Take a pen or object of similar size. Stick it in your ear. Continue to stick it in your ear for the next five years.

Lesson 14: Buy an expensive pair of glasses. Have those glasses wrenched from your face and thrown to the ground. Every day. Repeat for approximately the next 1825 days.

2011-01-17T20:41:00.001-05:00

So today I noticed something interesting. While Callum was playing in his jumper, a TV show came on which made him spin his head around like The Exorcist. After that, all bouncing ceased and he lay slumped over in his bouncer rapt. Since he was craning his neck around the chairs that were in the way, I sat him in his rocker for a few minutes just to see if he would lose interest.

Totally mesmerized...

Wondering what has him so fascinated?

Thomas the Tank! I guess he really is his daddy's son!

Zombie Baby

2011-01-16T09:09:00.000-05:00

Watch Chester mimic his daddy's moves. It's nice for a change for him to try to eat Tim rather than ME, i'll tell ya. It gets tiring feeling like a giant turkey leg all of the time.

2011-01-15T23:21:00.000-05:00

Teething Time

2011-01-12T23:59:00.001-05:00

Poor Chester. Ever since we got back from out West, he's been crying a lot. I think it may have to do with teething but this time, he's doing this new thing with his mouth. Basically, without actually unhinging his jaw, he opens it as WIDE as he can and screams bloody murder. Not sure where he picked it up, but it's the type of screaming that totally jangles your nerves and makes you drop things. Or in this case, take pictures.

what the...

2011-01-10T15:57:00.000-05:00

This is how I found Chester this morning. Sleeping on his face. Butt cocked high in the air. Apparently, he's been sleeping like this quite a bit. Particularly in the late night hours which Tim has caught a few times. I was treated to it for the first time today, so I thought I'd try to catch it on tape. This sure doesn't look like a comfy sleeping position.

Click Click Boom

2011-01-06T11:37:00.004-05:00

Ever since we got back from out west, Callum has been making some interesting noises. It all started when his Nana started making clicking sounds with her tongue while she held him. I'm not sure why she did this, but he'd stare in fascination at her, his brow furrowed. You could almost see the wheels spinning in his head. Now, it seems he's picked this up, no problem. In fact, if you click your tongue at him, he'll do it right back. I guess this will come in handy if he needs to speak some super rare African dialect, or perhaps negotiate with some highly evolved alien life form. See for yourself!

This one has a couple good clicks at the beginning, with some extra special comments added in near the end for good measure.

8 months: The recap

2010-12-30T13:57:00.003-05:00

It's amazing how quickly the month has whizzed by!

The most notable thing about Chester is what a happy kid he is turning into.

Until the teeth showed up.

They only showed up on the lower level...

But these two seemingly harmless little inhabitants changed the game.

Suddenly, our happy kid was not that happy...

And it only got worse...

Chester spent most of the time with something - anything - stuffed in his mouth...

Lucky he had lots of distractions.

Having his way with the mobile.

Look at that stare-down!

I found him on Christmas eve morning awake, having turned his mobile on.

Caught in the act!

He's been trying to crawl for the past few weeks. He has all the components at his disposal. He just hasn't put it together.

Luckily he has new friends to keep him occupied.

Ah...remotes. A boy's best friend.

We're excited to see what adventures this next month holds!

Chester's first Christmas!

2010-12-29T12:33:00.000-05:00

Christmas eve morning. Waking up the little fella...

He needed lots of time to open up the mountain of presents waiting for him.

Of course being Daddy's little boy, you know there's gonna be some superhero and Lego in the works at some point...I didn't realize it was gonna happen THIS fast though.

His grandma and godfather came by to spend a lovely afternoon before taking us to the airport.

Chester's first plane ride went off without a hitch. Most of the passengers had no idea there was a baby sitting near them.

I wonder why...

Chester didn't seem to mind being without his bouncer.

Does this next picture remind you of a certain scene from The Lord of the Rings?

The Hobbits vs. the Tree People mayhaps?

Chester got to reconnect with his favourite Auntie Barb and his cousin Riley. He met her when he was a couple of weeks ago. She was 7 months old at the time.

He's just a little older than she was at the time. How fast time flies.

Christmas dinner at his Aunt Barb and Uncle Dave's. You can't tell from the picture but there were lots of people at their home. Chester has never been around more than about four people at one time. He took it in stride.

I couldn't pass up the chance to dress him up like a big boy. A suit jacket, pinstripe shirt and cool red socks to mark the festive occasion!

His Nana and Grampy were thrilled to spend Chester's first Xmas with them.

I left the room for about half an hour, and when I came back, he was entertaining himself in his cousin's bouncer. A room full of people were sitting quietly watching him. Better than the hockey game? I think so.

His Auntie's mother in law, Evelyn, monopolized him for most of the night. If you wanted to meet the little guy, he was holding court on her lap for the evening. He seemed pretty cool with that.

The plane ride home had a few outbursts. Nothing a fast boob couldn't stifle. On both trips there was always one passenger that just couldn't resist smiling and making funny faces at him. It was neat to see his reaction. He'd suddenly start smiling or laughing and I wouldn't know why until I craned around to see what he was looking at. Such a friendly kid. When the passengers saw me, they looked a little sheepish - like they had been caught doing something bad. I've experienced this myself when I've been smiling at a child, only to see their parents whip around and look at me like I was The Exorcist. Ugh. I think this is just plain wrong. Ok, if I was a creepy old weirdo - sure I understand. But a young woman? Safety is one thing, paranoia is another. I would never want anyone to feel the way I was made to feel. Tim and I both smiled at the passengers who wanted to interact with our son and immediately put them at ease.

All in all, a wonderful holiday and a great first trip. Thanks to both our families for making it such a memorable Christmas for our new addition! We love you!

All I want for Christmas...

2010-12-23T16:46:00.003-05:00

...is my two front teeth.

Do the lower ones count?

HAPPY HOLIDAYS!!!